Dumb Little Blog

ryanstrong @ 2009-09-04T03:43:00

2009-09-04T10:48:06Z

Another summer, another West coast tour. I can easily see this becoming a pattern.

I hope I'm not getting sick, man. That would be a major buzzkill.

I really need to go to sleep.

ryanstrong @ 2009-08-31T02:34:00

2009-08-31T10:09:24Z

Tonight I had my mind completely fucking blown by the ending of Dante's Commedia. There's this thing where he turns the whole universe literally inside out, and it's... well, it's revelatory--which I suppose is precisely the point.

West-coast tour starts Thursday. I'll be gone until the following Sunday. I'm a bit apprehensive about the trip, but I know it will be a great time. I like being on the road, hanging out with friends old and new. I just hope I can get some decent food and sleep this time around.

ryanstrong @ 2009-08-07T08:46:00

2009-08-07T16:23:18Z

I like writing, but I don't want anyone to know how I really feel about anything.

Fuck it, then. I'm the only one who cares, anyway.

ryanstrong @ 2009-07-27T06:15:00

2009-07-27T13:08:56Z

I definitely miss writing, but I've been preoccupied, in many ways. Then again, my musical output is much higher, so I guess you just digest your environment.

I'm still playing a lot of shows--though thankfully not nearly as many as before. Still, going on a mini-tour next month with The Isotopes and a full west coast tour in September. Hopefully we can get a record or two out this winter.

Speaking of, I've started a record label with two partners. Our first release will be out August 16th, and I'm so excited for it that I'm sure I'll make a post about it when the time comes.

There's a lot more than that going on: resuming work on my cookbook, trying to finish writing an instrumental album, turning 27, etc. I just don't feel like getting into it right now. One thing at a time.

ryanstrong @ 2009-07-10T20:38:00

2009-07-11T03:55:40Z

So, I'm going to post this here, and I apologize for the self-promotion, but this is, as far as I'm concerned, the best show of the year, and I happen to be playing it:

I saw Dear Landlord in a basement a while ago (two years, maybe) and they were amazing. They didn't have anything out then, just two songs on myspace, and they blew us all away. This will be their first time back through since then, and they've just finally put out their first LP. Which is, though this may be a bit premature, one of the greatest pop-punk records ever released.

Anyway, tomorrow will rule. I'm sure this post won't bring anyone out, but it would be wrong of me not to try.

ryanstrong @ 2009-07-01T01:24:00

2009-07-01T08:41:57Z

Me? Well, I feel about as shitty as anyone else. Maybe more than most. Certainly above average, even for me. I just don't feel like writing about it anymore. I'm tired of my journal reading like a laundry list of abandoned ambitions.

Besides, I've always felt a good harrowing was meant to be experienced alone.

ryanstrong @ 2009-06-14T11:22:00

2009-06-14T18:25:01Z

I booked an awesome pop-punk show on Saturday. I hope I can see some of you there. I'm playing in two of these bands.

ryanstrong @ 2009-06-13T05:18:00

2009-06-13T12:22:44Z

I wish everyone would just grow a fucking attention span. It really bothers me that so many of us use the internet--inarguably the greatest information resource ever conceived--in such asinine ways. Facebook? Are you serious? What a colossal fucking waste of time.

I had cause today to apologize to someone because I haven't been checking my social networking accounts very often, but after I thought about it a bit, I realized that I'm not sorry at all. I've always loved livejournal, and although my actual posting is varied and infrequent, I've probably never gone more than a week without reading my friends page. The ability to look back at my posts over the years is extremely valuable to me, and although I've gone through several journals over the years--both online and on paper--and this is the only one I've had cause to continually revisit. In short--LJ rules, and I appreciate everyone who still uses it with any frequency.

I'm not blaming anyone for using Facebook, Twitter, or Myspace. I use all three, myself, but you have to admit, this shit is getting out of hand.

ryanstrong @ 2009-06-10T02:47:00

2009-06-10T10:27:59Z

Every time I log in to Myspace, I check the 'People You May Know' section, because I know that one of these times, all three of those suggested will be dead. I suppose it may have happened already, as I'm not terribly well informed of my friends' friends' vital signs. Only reasonably well, and as such, there are several people that continually show up in this sub-window whom I know to be quite dead.

I wonder if those in charge have given any thought to the fact that someday Myspace will be a virtual graveyard, a static, somewhat personal glimpse into the lives of the dead. Genealogical research could be made considerably easier.

According to a stupid website called MyDeathSpace (which despite the blasé title is rather tastefully done) over 10,000 deaths have been reported in the last three years--hardly a surprising statistic, in any case, but it is odd to consider that 10,000 times someone has ratted on their dead friend to that shitty place.

If there's a lesson to be learned, it's this: Right before you die--no matter the circumstance--hop online and make sure your Myspace page makes you look really fucking cool.

Me? I'm good to go.

ryanstrong @ 2009-05-28T06:04:00

2009-05-28T13:09:14Z

You know, I never could hit a curveball.

ryanstrong @ 2009-05-22T04:46:00

2009-05-22T11:47:22Z

ryanstrong @ 2009-05-05T21:53:00

2009-05-06T04:55:23Z

On my way home I met a stuttering ceramicist. We had a nice conversation. He particularly appreciated the way I anticipated his words, saving him the trouble of finishing his sentences.

ryanstrong @ 2009-04-28T17:52:00

2009-04-29T01:06:13Z

I've been pretty busy. New recordings from both of my bands, if you're interested:

ryanstrong @ 2009-04-19T06:27:00

2009-04-19T13:53:16Z

People don't realize that a shrug doesn't have to be non-committal. There's a huge difference between ambivalence and apathy, although it can be subtle from the outside. Sometimes it takes a supreme effort of will to ride the median, to maintain perfect ambivalence.

So if it seems like I don't give a shit--well, I probably don't--but it's altogether possible that I care in a more complex manner than I'm willing to describe.

Then again, I definitely do not give a shit about how other people interpret my emotions.

Shrug.

ryanstrong @ 2009-04-03T08:54:00

2009-04-03T16:02:05Z

Music is about the only thing keeping me going right now.

ryanstrong @ 2009-03-13T03:59:00

2009-03-13T11:12:14Z

I've been cooking a lot more lately. I wish my interests didn't suffer so much waxing and waning; instead of being reasonably good at a lot of random and disconnected things, I'd be really good at a few important ones. Oh, well, if we could choose the ways our energies were directed, we'd all be much better off.

Tonight, I made my first batch of properly emulsified vegan mayonnaise. It was pretty good, and I know that next time I make it, it will be awesome. The idea (using agar-agar to thicken soy milk, and emulsifying as normal) was technically sound, but it needed a few modifications for flavor's sake.

Also made perfect baba ghannouj and a quart of excellent vegetable stock. A few nights ago I made an awesome tofu à la sauce piquante. I wonder if the majority of cajuns would think it was fucking stupid that I integrate so many of their traditional methods into my cooking? I bet most of them would.

Staying up until 7:00am so I can make reubens and pommes de terre brabant for breakfast. It seems like odd breakfast, but I was starting to make them for dinner when Leslie fell asleep, so I just decided to go on with the tinkering I was doing and stall dinner for six or seven hours.

Boring post. Sorry. I'll be at the Manette tonight, and the GRN STRP House Saturday night.

ryanstrong @ 2009-03-09T07:23:00

2009-03-09T14:24:13Z

Wow. Worst LJ day in recent memory. Oh, well, my weekend was interesting, at least (note that "interesting" is not in all ways synonymous with "good"). Lots of fun band shit, and the hanging out that goes along with it. Some pretty awesome Nintendo playing. I crashed at a house legally rented by our mom for the first time since like eighth grade. You know, random stuff like that.

Wednesday our band is playing at Chop Suey, for Disney cover night, which I suppose is more or less annual. I went a few years ago, when it was at the Croc, and it was pretty much awesome. I hope we can get our covers fairly tight by then (we chose pretty ambitious songs, all things considered).

Fun stuff on the horizon.

ryanstrong @ 2009-03-04T16:05:00

2009-03-05T00:08:14Z

Fuck. I just woke up, late for band practice. I wish my stupid phone worked properly. Maybe now that my loans are consolidated, I can get a new one without a several hundred dollar deposit.

ryanstrong @ 2009-03-01T14:32:00

2009-03-01T23:24:12Z

It's been a month, and my, has it been a month. These past few weeks in particular have been great. Lots of fun parties and shows. As usual, several parts of the equation are missing, but you definitely get used to that.

I hate feeling like I'm holding back, or saving up. I guess I just wish I could be more consistent.

Infanticide

2009-02-01T11:21:43Z

How many children grow up to find the world to be precisely the size they had always imagined? All the stories told of infinite possibility and beauty beyond imagination were perpetuated by the ugly, and the unimaginative.

Infinity is the one true beauty, and is, un-coincidentally, quite beyond imagination.

ryanstrong @ 2009-01-28T16:21:00

2009-01-29T01:14:14Z

Is anyone familiar with the french expression "entre chien et loup"? Literally translated, of course, it means "between dog and wolf" but is much more idiomatic than that. It refers quite specifically to the twilight hour, where there's enough light to see an animal in front of you, but not enough to make out whether it's a dog or a wolf.

The French vocabulary is actually rather small, with a great many workarounds and double-entendre. As with many colloquialisms, entre chien et loup has a sort of perpetually evolving and deepening meaning.

Every aspect of my life, at this precise moment, is entre chien et loup. Between the known and the unknown, the tame and the wild. The last breath of light before the plunge into darkness.

The worst part is: I look around and I don't see anyone whose situation I truly envy. Most of my friends and family are in pretty fucked up situations, each in their own respective fashions. I know that I have little-if any-more to complain about than anyone else does, but that makes the whole situation that much more infuriating.

Everyone born without mental defect knows that life is unfair (which is ironic, in and of itself) and I've obviously seen a great deal of that, in some of it's rawest incarnations, growing up on the mean streets of Seabeck. Never have I seen my extended network© in such a sad state. Blame our age, our economy, our geography, I don't care. Let's just help each other make things right again.

We all need more help than we let on.

ryanstrong @ 2009-01-24T02:30:00

2009-01-24T10:33:38Z

I'm really tired of having jobs, that, in a better life, I could be programming fucking robots to do.

I quit.

ryanstrong @ 2009-01-17T06:02:00

2009-01-17T14:36:55Z

In a dream, a crone came up behind me and whispered, much too loudly, into my ear

"The woman with the voice of a thousand blackbirds will screech your guilt into the night."

The only ones who could hear were those who hadn't been listening.

ryanstrong @ 2009-01-14T06:31:00

2009-01-14T14:36:52Z

Sometimes right before someone opens their mouth, you just know...

Some aspects of life feel so scripted, even-and indeed, especially-when you don't see them coming.

I could have written all your lines.

Chapter XXVI, Outline

2009-01-07T09:59:50Z

I'm aware that this horse has been well-flogged, but here is my 2008 rundown.

Highlights:
Moved to Seattle
Joined a band, went on tour, recorded at a legit studio, played some great venues
Got an easy job with health insurance
Got into shape via regular exercise
First full year as a vegan
Didn't use opiates at all
Cut down alcohol consumption significantly
Opened my mind to external assistance

Disappointments:
Didn't go back to school
Didn't cook as much as I had in previous years
Lost a bunch of stuff in a hard drive crash (though nothing terribly important)

2008 was easily the most productive and satisfying year of my life, and still I feel singularly restless. Shall I never have peace?